All Falls Down
by klutzykay
Summary: ... Dan knows his life is hardly as picturesque as he would like to believe, but that doesn't stop him from wishing it would never end... Dan reflects on the life he's made and the people who threaten to ruin it all.
1. All Falls Down 1

All Falls Down  
Part 1 of 3  
By klutzykay

If one asked about it, Dan Scott would say his life couldn't be more perfect, and maybe some of him would actually believe it. Deep down he knows it's a lie, though, and that it couldn't be any more messed up.

Because his life is now a delicate balance of deception and truth, lacking all the honesty and unquestionable blacks and whites that he once knew as constants. He always seems to be juggling lie after lie with the occasional truth thrown in, mixing them all together and making the grey he's grown so accustomed to, all the while keeping his cold, brave face up as to not disturb the world he's built around himself, not to mention the people in it.

He knows all too well that it's an imperfect structure that he's made, with kinks and weaknesses marring the walls left and right, but Dan doesn't think he could make it any better if he tried. Because for all his lies, Dan never said he was an architect.

And although he'll never say it, the constant balancing act that is his life could easily be jeopardized and then scattered if they decided to walk back into his life again.

Because seeing them, being near them even in the least bit... that, that would irreparably mess with the balance he so strives for.

Dan Scott knows that someday it'll all come crashing down, but he really doesn't like to think about that too often. Usually he just pushes it to the back of his mind for another day and tries to forget about it, to forget about them, for just a little bit longer.

Because a part of him hopes that maybe, just maybe if he ignores it that day will never come.

The rest knows better.

Dan Scott knows that the picturesque existence he's managed to create for himself is hardly as perfect as he makes it out to be. But that doesn't stop him from wishing it would never end.

To Be Continued in Part 2 of 3.


	2. All Falls Down 2

All Falls Down  
Part 2 of 3  
By neka lopez aka klutzy kay

They mess with the balance. They seem to have a ripple effect on the foundations he's built his life on, and day after day Dan tries to clean up the disarray they always seem to be leaving behind before Deb and Nathan even have time to notice it's there.

Because he knows if they were to ever realize what's been going on all these years Deb would surely leave, and Nathan would soon follow.

Yes, they most definitely do mess with the balance.

And in his denial he asks himself how and why they distract him so, but truthfully he knows. He's just not willing to admit it.

* * *

Dan can't concentrate when they're around. He can't keep up with the normalcy of the very world he's created, and nothing could scare him more than that does. 

Because when they're around, so close yet so far away from him, all he sees is them. Not Deb or Nathan or the rest of the world, just them with their second rate clothes and that unfathomable happiness they display at every turn.

And in place of Nathan's next game and the latest small business he's buying out, all he can find himself thinking about is how much the boy has grown, with his awkward, gangly limbs and a voice that's suddenly too deep for recognition.

But that's not mentioning the thoughts of her, with her dark brown hair curtaining her kind, beautiful face and her warm eyes sparkling just like they used to... just like they used to when she looked up at him.

As said before, Dan really can't concentrate when they're around.

And he will never say it, but it's then, in those quick, fleeting moments and a series of desperate, furtive glances, that he starts to think that it's not just them that are messing with the balance.

Because maybe if he were stronger he wouldn't let them.

To Be Continued in Part 3 of 3


	3. All Falls Down 3

All Falls Down  
Part 3 of 3  
By neka lopez aka klutzy kay

It falls just as he expected it to. Piece by piece, little by little, so slowly that at first he hardly recognizes it. That is, until too much time has passed and it's all just too far gone to salvage.

Ironically it happens just as they slip from his memory for the longest time, longer than he could have ever dreamed of, and he couldn't be more surprised.

But what he really finds funny is the way it slows down as soon as he notices, as though the fates want him to see everything fall apart just out of some kind of twisted vengeance.

* * *

He doesn't understand why they would do this to him. He really, truly doesn't think he's done anything to deserve it, because hadn't he done as Karen demanded that cold winter night all those years ago and stayed away? Hadn't he kept his distance, made sure the boy never felt his presence? She'd said it herself, he had delivered in fine fashion. 

But that's really not what's bothering him, he knows deep down.

Because when he lies alone in bed at night he tells himself he would've stopped them if he hadn't been so caught off guard.

He prides himself in being a good liar, but most of him knows that it's a bare-faced lie anyway.

* * *

The pitiful remains of his life finally slam down into the ground on a Tuesday, and it leaves him more alone than he had ever imagined possible. 

He doesn't know what to do when it happens, doesn't know what to say.

Of course, it wasn't like it mattered by the time he manages to get his jaw off the floor. There isn't anyone to tell even if he did have the words.

...Yes, it all fell down just as he expected to, yet somehow he couldn't be any more surprised.

End of All Falls Down.

Note: There could be continuation of this story, if I decided to actually use the events of season 1 or some original plotlines. Does anyone have any thoughts on it?


End file.
